I completed my term as an AmeriCorps member this past Friday. The last two weeks were rough, but I expected that based on the agenda I adopted to try and leave a legacy in the last two weeks that could ensure idealism could exist at our site in the future.
By our first day back from cyzygy, I had written a letter to our Service Director and Executive Director outlining three substantial and disappointing instances when City Year Columbus failed to live up to its idealism based on their decisions. Rather than address these issues I had with the site, I was called into a meeting with them where they told me letters were an ineffective form of communication, it was largely my fault that City Year didn't meet my expectations, and that I should not ask hard questions of the staff. I should trust them and all that they do. I found this insulting. Needless to say, the following days were painful and I closed up from the site and sought to only refrain from getting fired so I could still receive my Education Award.
Even after all of this, I still found a sampling of hope from our Program Director. During our end-of-the-year debrief, we discussed some of these issues in a deeper manner than was available when talking with the ED or SD. He assured me that he was doing what he can to solve the problem. His actions throughout the year, unlike the others I was supposed to trust, allowed me to believe what he said. As such, I feel that perhaps idealism will reign triumphant at City Year again in the future.
This was an exceptionally vague post--too stream of consciousness, perhaps--but it is the best for what I wanted to say.